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| (S) |
Bonjour, mes amis! Je suis parle Francais porquai Je..uh..can. I really can't speak good French. Fortunately, this isn't about French stuff! It's about asexual stuff! And elitists and clubs and groups and all of those sorts of things.
Please note: this is my experience. I am not in any way saying everything is like this. Okay? This is my disclaimer. I am not hating on people. Making this clear.
So I'm from the magical land of Canada... I mean tumblr. Withing the past year I've identified as asexual and found a lot of asexual blogs on tumblr. Asexuals make up a small percent of the queer community so finding a group of fellow aces is pretty nice. And as a whole, they've been a community. I've had my share of questions, I've even answered some questions for others. It's a group that is accepting to all aces. Even to sexual people. It's all very laid back, most people are more than happy to explain their orientation to others.
Good. We have that preface done. I'm gonna come back to this. Remember this, okay?
Remember back in the day at school, elementary school when at recess kids would form clubs? And each club would have different rules and if some kids had a club, you'd make your own. And well, the clubs ended in tears and involved excluding others.
That's how I see sexual orientation communities. Not nearly as petty. Not at all. What I mean is it's a group with certain..for lack of a better word “rules” for certain people. Maybe groups would be a better word. Or areas? Territories? Divisions?
Anyway, a spot for a group of people with similar things, in this case sexuality. Some people identify as straight and by definition, it means attracted to the opposite gender. Some are gay (attracted to the same gender) and so on.
Now what really is the main differences between orientations and school clubs is how to join. A school club you usually have to do some dare to get in. With orientation? It's up to the individual. Someone identities as... say straight? Then they're straight. No questions asked.
As of late in the tumblr world, I've noticed there's a lot of grey areas. I now view sexuality as a Venn diagram. Things can overlap or blur into another. Someone is attracted to their same gender sexually but sensually attracted to the opposite adds a bit of a curve ball. It's hard to put on an exact title when multiple titles could fit... or maybe even no titles. Sexuality, I've found, is not an exact science. Everyone is slightly different from another so it's near impossible to fit everyone in an already existing box.
This is what I'm segueing to. Remember in the school clubs there were kids that took it too seriously so it wasn't fun anymore? That really took the rules seriously and if you were late to a club meeting, you were in big trouble. The kid that would try to kick others from the club for whatever reason. Remember those kids? Yeah. Growing up, I've realised there are always going to be those kids. Those people who are almost an elitist when there's really nothing to be elite about. Can I make a book reference? Harry Potter. They're all wizards. Draco's a pureblood so he thinks he's so much better than Hermione who isn't a pureblood. But they're both wizards and Hermione is clever, but Draco is being an elitist because of his bloodline.
But I never though the asexual community would have any elitists, not with it so underpopulated. Asexuals make for a small portion of the queer community. So I had assumed all aces would be a team. Our own little team sticking together through thick and thin because we are mighty together! But... nope. There's elitists everywhere.
I'm not going to name names, but recently, I've come into contact with an elitist, trying to redefine definitions and kick certain people out of the orientation. Which is kind of impossible because orientation is based on the individual, not everyone else. Someone identifies as asexual? Then they are. No questions asked. Can't kick them out.
But honestly I did find this disheartening to see someone trying to be better than everyone else. But we're all asexuals, I thought. Small in a number, but mighty together. All accepting and loving. But I was wrong. Of course some friends of mine don't have those views and even spoke out against the elitist. This is my favourite by far:
“For goodness’ sake, we aren’t leading a revolution. There isn’t a need for some kind of asexual class reform that will only cause dissension. If anything, there is more need for unity and acceptance than ever before, and that should be the answer to any wrongs, whether perceived or real. Not…this sort of thing. Warmongering is not welcome.” (Jazz)
This is why I saved this for last, it sums up what I was trying to say this entire time, really. That there can't really be elitists if we're all the same at the end of the day. And I still am slightly baffled there are elitists. Of course this was probably a wake-up call, that not all things are perfect. There will always be those few people who take things too far. Always. I suppose there will always be elitists in groups, no matter how small.
Please note: this is my experience. I am not in any way saying everything is like this. Okay? This is my disclaimer. I am not hating on people. Making this clear.
So I'm from the magical land of Canada... I mean tumblr. Withing the past year I've identified as asexual and found a lot of asexual blogs on tumblr. Asexuals make up a small percent of the queer community so finding a group of fellow aces is pretty nice. And as a whole, they've been a community. I've had my share of questions, I've even answered some questions for others. It's a group that is accepting to all aces. Even to sexual people. It's all very laid back, most people are more than happy to explain their orientation to others.
Good. We have that preface done. I'm gonna come back to this. Remember this, okay?
Remember back in the day at school, elementary school when at recess kids would form clubs? And each club would have different rules and if some kids had a club, you'd make your own. And well, the clubs ended in tears and involved excluding others.
That's how I see sexual orientation communities. Not nearly as petty. Not at all. What I mean is it's a group with certain..for lack of a better word “rules” for certain people. Maybe groups would be a better word. Or areas? Territories? Divisions?
Anyway, a spot for a group of people with similar things, in this case sexuality. Some people identify as straight and by definition, it means attracted to the opposite gender. Some are gay (attracted to the same gender) and so on.
Now what really is the main differences between orientations and school clubs is how to join. A school club you usually have to do some dare to get in. With orientation? It's up to the individual. Someone identities as... say straight? Then they're straight. No questions asked.
As of late in the tumblr world, I've noticed there's a lot of grey areas. I now view sexuality as a Venn diagram. Things can overlap or blur into another. Someone is attracted to their same gender sexually but sensually attracted to the opposite adds a bit of a curve ball. It's hard to put on an exact title when multiple titles could fit... or maybe even no titles. Sexuality, I've found, is not an exact science. Everyone is slightly different from another so it's near impossible to fit everyone in an already existing box.
This is what I'm segueing to. Remember in the school clubs there were kids that took it too seriously so it wasn't fun anymore? That really took the rules seriously and if you were late to a club meeting, you were in big trouble. The kid that would try to kick others from the club for whatever reason. Remember those kids? Yeah. Growing up, I've realised there are always going to be those kids. Those people who are almost an elitist when there's really nothing to be elite about. Can I make a book reference? Harry Potter. They're all wizards. Draco's a pureblood so he thinks he's so much better than Hermione who isn't a pureblood. But they're both wizards and Hermione is clever, but Draco is being an elitist because of his bloodline.
But I never though the asexual community would have any elitists, not with it so underpopulated. Asexuals make for a small portion of the queer community. So I had assumed all aces would be a team. Our own little team sticking together through thick and thin because we are mighty together! But... nope. There's elitists everywhere.
I'm not going to name names, but recently, I've come into contact with an elitist, trying to redefine definitions and kick certain people out of the orientation. Which is kind of impossible because orientation is based on the individual, not everyone else. Someone identifies as asexual? Then they are. No questions asked. Can't kick them out.
But honestly I did find this disheartening to see someone trying to be better than everyone else. But we're all asexuals, I thought. Small in a number, but mighty together. All accepting and loving. But I was wrong. Of course some friends of mine don't have those views and even spoke out against the elitist. This is my favourite by far:
“For goodness’ sake, we aren’t leading a revolution. There isn’t a need for some kind of asexual class reform that will only cause dissension. If anything, there is more need for unity and acceptance than ever before, and that should be the answer to any wrongs, whether perceived or real. Not…this sort of thing. Warmongering is not welcome.” (Jazz)
This is why I saved this for last, it sums up what I was trying to say this entire time, really. That there can't really be elitists if we're all the same at the end of the day. And I still am slightly baffled there are elitists. Of course this was probably a wake-up call, that not all things are perfect. There will always be those few people who take things too far. Always. I suppose there will always be elitists in groups, no matter how small.
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