One Year Out

I will not go in to my whole story here, what you do need to know is that I spent the better part of my adult life in the closet about my asexuality. Being in the closet cut a self destructive swath across my early growth. I'm thirty five as of this writing and I have only been out, to myself and others, for about a year. Needless to say, this has been the single best year of my life. I have not hesitated to come out to the world since accepting myself in full. I have used the full range of the media available to the average person in this day and age to tell anyone who will listen that I am ace and I'm glad to be so.

One of the most enriching experiences of this year has been getting to know other asexuals. Most of that has been online but some of it has been through my local meetup group. Arranged and organized on line though it is, it is a real world activity. Now, I've never been much of a joiner in to begin with. I hated the competition of athletic teams, the rigid structure of youth organizations, the ideologies of political and religious groups and the gendered/sexual undertones of most socializing. So needless to say I was wary of any new group. Over the years I had allowed my rejection of social norms to fester and morph into awkwardness and anxiety. I had coped in the past by drinking myself numb but had sobered up over the last few years and found myself looking to meet new folks. I hadn't been comfortable going to any of my old stomping grounds and was pleased to note that the meetup group got together in a cafe. I had no reasons not to go and had promised online friends and acquaintances that I would show up. Once I make a promise I keep it.