This was the last tweet made by Jamey Rodemeyer, a 14 year old freshman from Buffalo, NY, who was bullied incessantly because of his sexual orientation and subsequently took his own life on Sunday 18th September 2011.
Just 4 months ago, Jamey took part in the It Gets Better project founded by Dan Savage, by posting his It Gets Better message to LGBT teens who are going through a rough time. In his video he quoted Lady Gaga and said "Just love yourself and you're set". It's tragic to see that from May, at the time of his It Gets Better video, to September, the message of hope he was spreading was somehow lost on him in those last few hours of his short life. Tracey Rodemeyer, Jamey's mother, said a lot of the bullying occurred on social networking sites which "made it still accessible for people to do their bullying" throughout the summer holidays.
His parents said Jamey "had the biggest heart [...] and he was well loved by everybody which included friends, teachers and of course, family". Tracey told CNN, "in the video it seemed like he was over the hump and wanted to send the message to everybody else because he knows how he felt and doesn't want anyone else to feel like him".
Tim Rodemeyer, Jamey's father, said they were aware that he was being bullied from middle school onwards and he got help from a social worker and he also had some counselling which seemed to be helping him combat the depression inflicted upon him by his bullies. There's a two-fold message to Jamey's suicide. First of all, Jamey believed in equality for all and that there's no reason to pick on people for the way they are, be it fat, skinny, gay, lesbian, transgender, disabled, black or white. Secondly, his suicide reminds us that there needs to be a better (that is to say, better than the practically non-existant) anti-bullying campaign to protect all students from bullying, not just in the US, but all over the world. There's strength in numbers when it comes to bullying. One person, alone, can't stand up to a bully. They need help and support from friends, teachers or colleagues who can stand up to the bully with them and make he or she powerless. Jamey, unfortuneately, didn't get enough support from his peers. He had said that he didn't always have the support of the online community (on which he relied tremendously) when he said he was being bullied. Over the last few weeks he complained that "nobody listened" when he needed them to. We need to remember how important gay rights YouTubers and gay collab channels are and what a powerful tool the internet is to start making a difference.
His parents claim he seemed alright the night before the suicide but the biggest mystery remains "what happened around the time of the 18th that pushed him to take his own life?" Police are now opening a criminal investigation into Jamey's suicide after multiple anonymous hate comments were found around Jamey's Tumblr, Twitter and YouTube account. There are currently no bullying laws in New York State, but the Amherst Police Special Victims Unit is weighing harassment, cyber-harassment or hate crime charges for three students at Williamsville North High School, where he had just started his freshman year.
Daryl Presgraves of the Gay, Lesbian and Straight Education Network (GLSEN), told ABC News that the internet has been a double-edged sword for LGBT teens. "You have a scenario where for a lot of youth, it’s the only [place they can go] and seek peers to give them support and to feel connected to a community," Presgraves said. "At the same time, they expose themselves to negative cyberbullying."
If only someone listened...
If only it never happened...
If only he knew how bright the future would have been...
Life is full of "if onlys", but only if we react when it's too late.
RIP Jamey.
___________________________________________________________If you or someone you know is thinking about suicide, please remember that there is help.
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Also, the following national hotlines are free and confidential, available 24 hours a day, 7 days a week:
The Trevor Project
24/7 Suicide Hotline for GLBTQI Youth
1-866-4-U-Trevor
www.thetrevorproject.org
USA National Suicide Prevention Hotline
24/7, Free & Confidential
1-800-SUICIDE
www.hopeline.com
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