Hey guys. Today I’m going to get straight into the crux of this post, it’s about something I read today and hey... I’m thought provoked. You know like how some things just keep you thinking and thinking; well this has, and I’m still unsure, but yeah. It kinda makes sense to me. It’s about love, or about being in love. So we’ve all been in love, or have loved something, right? Well, maybe not. Maybe we've got it wrong, according to what I read today.
The post was placed on this Facebook page and I have taken an excerpt of it here.
Love should be like breathing. It should be just a quality in you - wherever you are, with whomsoever you are, or even if you are alone, love goes on overflowing from you. It is not a question of being in love with someone - it is a question of being love. People are frustrated in their love experiences, not because something is wrong with love... they narrow down love to such a point that the ocean of love cannot remain there. You cannot contain the ocean - it is not a small stream; love is your whole being - love is your godliness.
Before I continue, I just want to say one thing, and that is that there should be a word that distinguishes love from romantic love. I can love my husband, and I can love my son, and I can love my friends, and they are all different forms of love. In this article, the loves we will be referring to will be both friendship and romantic love, and you the reader will need to understand the difference in your own mind, within each reference.
“Love should be like breathing”... let’s face it, most of the time, it’s not. You go along all by yourself, a single person, happily existing, doing the things you want to do to please yourself, eating the things you want to eat to please yourself, going to bed when you want, getting up when you want, etcetera. And then... you fall in love. Suddenly, although you may feel like the person you have fallen for has given you air to breathe, has reignited your passion etc, you are suddenly not doing the things you do when you are simply breathing. Now, you rush to eat your meal early because you’re flying out to see your love. You are up later seeing your love (or going to bed at all different times of the day) because now there is somebody else you are wanting to impress or wanting to just be around. But look – you are not doing the things you do when you just breathe. It’s an almost unnatural state of affairs, because you can’t carry on simply not doing any of the things you would normally do. Those were your survival things, the things you had to do in your daily life to keep things ticking over. Love is all great, but eating has its merits too, and you can’t never go to work just because you are in love and want to spend all your time with your beloved. And here’s where the crunch comes in. Can the love and emotion you've found, stand the change back to your mundane everyday life?
It is not a question of being in love with someone -- it is a question of being love.
Whew... this is rather a challenging line to come to terms with. It’s a huge step. One I’m nowhere near succeeding at. But being far away from it doesn't mean one shouldn't try! It’s a question not of being in love with someone but of being love. Let’s have a go at the last part of the sentence first – it is a question of being love. When you think about THAT in terms of honesty, it means that therefore, you should never ever be angry with anyone again. Because if you are love, you can’t be angry, or hate filled or bitter. It means you would just accept someone no matter what their beliefs and personalities are like. You would just not EXPECT anything from them, but you’d see their true values for what they are. It’s one hell of a freedom, don’t you think? To the other person in the relationship, and to you. Because you’d now be free of expecting something from them, and they’d be free of having you expect something. They wouldn’t have to deliver. They could just BE. And you’d know you’d never be disappointed, because you didn’t expect anything. You could just be excited and happy, because now, if something good does transpire, you weren’t expecting it but it’s a bonus. So much the good.
And now for the first part of the sentence: “It’s not a question of being in love with someone.” Well, I don’t know about that. When I met my first partner, I was certainly in love with him. It felt a lot different to any other kind of feeling I had ever experienced. I loved him – all of him, the length and breadth and width of him, inside and out. But loving like that certainly sets you up to be putting expectations on the other person, and indeed on yourself. In essence though, I do agree with the statement in its entirety and I’m wondering whether it’s my bisexuality that allows me to so easily accept a statement of that magnitude, right now at the age of 37. It almost seems to be a sentence that has dropped into my mind, into a slot that it fits into, and I’m saying: “Well then. That’s what that’s about then.” And it’s going to be a hard thing to live up to. Life knocks you. Things happen and you get bitter, and twisted and angry and annoyed. And here’s this statement saying “no, you mustn't . You’ve got to BE LOVE. But I’m understanding it more. Being love doesn’t mean that you have to accept the wrongs in life. It means that you have to make things right, guide people, show them the right way. MAKE LOVE. Being love is making love. And not in the way you’re thinking!
It’s back at Making Love Not War. And that’s where enacting Being Love will get us.. if the whole world learned to BE LOVE, there could not possibly be war. But let’s apply it more directly into our own homes and lives. Most of us if not all of us have some sort of conflict and strife going on. See if you can manage to apply the theory of being love to that. I don’t say that this is going to be an easy thing to do. Not for me, either. But maybe we can do it bit by bit, step by step – just practice on one person a day , then two, then three. And maybe, sooner or later, we’ll all be in the habit of BEING LOVE.
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