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This week I’ve been wondering why people have so much trouble just accepting their fellow human beings. I mean, we’re all fundamentally the same. We all breathe and eat and cry and get sick. We all complain about things and annoy our friends, whether we mean to or not. There are things we hate and things we love. We are all, at least in some ways, the same.
Let me explain why I’ve been thinking about this so much.
This week at university we had a debate. Actually we have debates every week, but this was the first time we’ve had a QUILTBAG related one. The subject we were debating was whether the government should subsidise films and TV shows with transgender characters in and, being a debate, naturally there was a lot of divided opinion.
On one side of the debate there were those who wanted the visibility that subsidies would bring. They argued that the costs of it didn’t matter. Any character, whether they were a stereotype or fully rounded and real, was a representation that would start discourse and create more visibility for trans* people.
On the other side there was the argument that stereotypes and negativity would spread throughout society. Young people growing up and discovering themselves might see people just like them being mocked and ridiculed on TV and throughout society. Because the media holds so much influence over society and their perceptions of other people, this kind of representation can only be detrimental, both to the treatment of trans* people throughout wider society, and potentially to the way they see themselves.
I know from experience, and you all probably do too, that when enough people hate you and hold negative stereotypes against you, it hurts and it starts to get to you, to the point where you start to lose confidence in yourself. Even when you’re okay with who you are and you accept yourself, it can still shake that.
Another idea that came out of the debate was the fact that maybe we want equality to be real, not subsidised and handed to us. If QUILTBAG people are represented on TV and in films it should be because we’re a real and every day part of society. We shouldn’t be thrown in to get extra money or because the government says it’s a good idea. We are part of the human race. QUILTBAG characters should be treated as normally as ethnic or disabled ones. Just there. Just normal. Just like everyone else.
On a similar note, someone in the debate pointed out that once a trans* person has transitioned they’re visible just as a man or a woman. There’s not necessarily anything to mark them out as trans*. Now, I know that there are so many different approaches and choices to be made that this isn’t necessarily always true, but it does raise an important point, similar to that above. Surely we should just accept someone as the gender they identify as? Maybe they don’t ascribe to what we think a man or a women should be, but can’t we just get over it? It’s not our job to look at someone and tell them they look weird, that they’re not masculine or feminine enough, that they’re odd or different or wrong. It’s our job to accept those around us whole-heartedly as who they are, be that man, woman or anything in between or other.
And of course this extends to absolutely everyone, be they gay or straight or bi, whatever the colour of their skin, whether they have some sort of disability or not, no matter if they’re religious or not. Everyone deserves acceptance and to be treated well and kindly (yes, even the assholes. Just because they’re going to be horrible to us doesn’t mean we should retaliate) because everyone is just the same in the end, and I really fail to understand why anyone doesn’t see that.
Maybe it’s fear, maybe it’s lack of education, maybe it’s something else. I suppose that throughout human history groups of people have found reasons to hate one another for their differences, but you know what? Differences are great! Differences means we’re all unique and interesting individuals. Difference keeps us from blending together into one boring blur of similarity. We can learn from those who are different from us. They can show us new ways of looking at the world. They can give us new ideas and opinions about science and art and pretty much every other subject you can think of. We should all acknowledge our similarities, but at the same embrace our differences and celebrate them as they are the things that mark us out as truly human, because if we all looked the same and felt the same and loved the same, we’d just be robots. And that would be boring.
Let me explain why I’ve been thinking about this so much.
This week at university we had a debate. Actually we have debates every week, but this was the first time we’ve had a QUILTBAG related one. The subject we were debating was whether the government should subsidise films and TV shows with transgender characters in and, being a debate, naturally there was a lot of divided opinion.
On one side of the debate there were those who wanted the visibility that subsidies would bring. They argued that the costs of it didn’t matter. Any character, whether they were a stereotype or fully rounded and real, was a representation that would start discourse and create more visibility for trans* people.
On the other side there was the argument that stereotypes and negativity would spread throughout society. Young people growing up and discovering themselves might see people just like them being mocked and ridiculed on TV and throughout society. Because the media holds so much influence over society and their perceptions of other people, this kind of representation can only be detrimental, both to the treatment of trans* people throughout wider society, and potentially to the way they see themselves.
I know from experience, and you all probably do too, that when enough people hate you and hold negative stereotypes against you, it hurts and it starts to get to you, to the point where you start to lose confidence in yourself. Even when you’re okay with who you are and you accept yourself, it can still shake that.
Another idea that came out of the debate was the fact that maybe we want equality to be real, not subsidised and handed to us. If QUILTBAG people are represented on TV and in films it should be because we’re a real and every day part of society. We shouldn’t be thrown in to get extra money or because the government says it’s a good idea. We are part of the human race. QUILTBAG characters should be treated as normally as ethnic or disabled ones. Just there. Just normal. Just like everyone else.
On a similar note, someone in the debate pointed out that once a trans* person has transitioned they’re visible just as a man or a woman. There’s not necessarily anything to mark them out as trans*. Now, I know that there are so many different approaches and choices to be made that this isn’t necessarily always true, but it does raise an important point, similar to that above. Surely we should just accept someone as the gender they identify as? Maybe they don’t ascribe to what we think a man or a women should be, but can’t we just get over it? It’s not our job to look at someone and tell them they look weird, that they’re not masculine or feminine enough, that they’re odd or different or wrong. It’s our job to accept those around us whole-heartedly as who they are, be that man, woman or anything in between or other.
And of course this extends to absolutely everyone, be they gay or straight or bi, whatever the colour of their skin, whether they have some sort of disability or not, no matter if they’re religious or not. Everyone deserves acceptance and to be treated well and kindly (yes, even the assholes. Just because they’re going to be horrible to us doesn’t mean we should retaliate) because everyone is just the same in the end, and I really fail to understand why anyone doesn’t see that.
Maybe it’s fear, maybe it’s lack of education, maybe it’s something else. I suppose that throughout human history groups of people have found reasons to hate one another for their differences, but you know what? Differences are great! Differences means we’re all unique and interesting individuals. Difference keeps us from blending together into one boring blur of similarity. We can learn from those who are different from us. They can show us new ways of looking at the world. They can give us new ideas and opinions about science and art and pretty much every other subject you can think of. We should all acknowledge our similarities, but at the same embrace our differences and celebrate them as they are the things that mark us out as truly human, because if we all looked the same and felt the same and loved the same, we’d just be robots. And that would be boring.
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